RAISING REAL MEN MONDAY (oops, it's Wednesday)

Okay, so Monday came and went, and I totally forgot to post. So here is my thoughts on this chapter. Chapter One - Someone To Look Up To. This chapter was all about heroes. Boys always have heroes, either positive or negative. We already see this in Mr A. who loves Spiderman, Batman, and Superman, and has never actually watched a TV show or movie about any of them. According to Hal and Melanie Young, "What we admire, we tend to become." Wow, never thought about that before, even though I already knew this too be true. We need to teach our sons that Jesus is the ultimate hero. Often, the Jesus our kids hear about and see pictures of is a man who looks, well, girly. Jesus is a real man for our boys to look up to, admire, and aspire to be. After Jesus comes the dad. Big responsibility lies on the dad's shoulders. It is the dad who give the child their first glimpse of who Jesus is.
I have so much underlined in this book. I cannot say enough good things about this.
They speak about TV, and what we allow our boys to watch on TV. We don't own a TV, but we do let Andrew watch videos on YouTube. I liked how they put it, "Isn't it better for our children to live out their own adventures than to spend their lives watching other people who are pretending to have a life for the cameras? How pathetic."
Okay, I am going to keep this short, because it is almost midnight, and I need to sleep. Sorry, a delayed post and a short one....

oh...and need to add, we never got an offer on the car. :(

RAISING REAL MEN MONDAY

I just bought this book, “Raising Real Men” by Hal and Melanie Young. Boy oh boy, is this book ever a gooder. Seriously. I think all mothers of boys should read this book. I am trying to read this book and really soak it in. I have decided to read one chapter a week, and blog about. This week I read the introduction and Part 1. The book is divided up into two parts, Part One is called “Virtues In the Rough” and Part Two is called “Civilization for the Tough”.

This book speaks to me on so many levels. I seriously could quote this entire book. It is THAT good. Part One felt like it was describing A to a “t”. This book is helping me understand who my boy’s are, who God made them to be. I am going to quote the author’s once, because they describe the book perfectly.

“What this book offers is a biblical perspective- note “a”, not “the” – on understanding how boys think, and why that is, and what can and should be done about it….We’ve found that many of the troubles and concerns we had were clarified when we looked to what God intended them to be. The situation looked different when we truly valued manly virtues and masculinity and when we understood that we had to rebuke sin but should not change our boys into something they were not.”

Our culture, myself included, wants our boy to behave like girls. We want them to play like girls, sit still like girls, be quiet like girls. We want them to be girls, basically. This is such an insult, not only to our boys, but to God. God created both man and woman in his image and what we are telling him and his creation is that they are wrong, they we should all be made to be like woman. They need to do things our way. How messed up is that? I even find myself doing this with my husband – wanting him to do things my way.

I need to throw another quote in here. “Women are praised to the extent they act like men, and men are praised for how womanly they become.” Ouch. That one stings me.

I am not saying that boys are to run wild and be disobedient. I am learning that boys need to be boys, and we need to stop pushing them to be girls.

The book explains how boys are born with the virtues of men, but they are just untaught. We need to teach them, and allow them to be boys. The virtues that we love in a man are the very virtues that drive us the most crazy in our boys.

One more quote. “:What are the manly virtues?...competitiveness, aggression, a desire for adventure…heroism, courage, endurance, fortitude…protectors, persistent, honorable, intrepid...Those virtues are present in seed form in our boys. Will we cultivate them and help bring them to fruition? Or will we trade the opportunity for a little more peace and quiet, and hope their future will take care of itself?”

Mothers of boys, you NEED this book. Seriously. Hal and Melanie Young have six sons, and two daughters, so they have had a lot of experience raising boys. I have never underlines to many things in my life. I cannot recommend this book enough.

For more information on this book and where to purhase, visit the Young's website.

A sleepy post

I just wanted to let anyone know who is reading that I haven't given up on the 21 Days of Prayer for your son. I just found out today that I won a free copy of the e-book that you are supposed to be following for the 21 days. Yay. So exciting. I am going to start again, even though I was only on day two.

I found this book a while ago, Raising Real Men: Surviving, Teaching and Appreciating Boys.

I ordered a copy and I am just waiting for it. I am so excited. It is by a couple who have 6 sons and 2 daughters. I read the first two chapters on google books free preview and I LOVED them. When I get the book and start reading it, I will definitely be posting about it.

Gabe and I are pretty much sitting at 99% sure that we will be home schooling our boys. The only thing that is holding me back is how social my little A is. He makes friends everywhere he goes, and every.single.day he asks me "where are we going? can we go visit someone?" He asks me to stop at every house while driving so we can go in for a visit. He LOVES people. I am coming to realize that he could still have a full social life and be home schooled, just not with kids his own age. That might be okay. He is a sponge and soaks up everything, negative or positive. We don't allow the use of the word "stupid" in our house, but we hear it everywhere we go. It's not that stupid will always be a word we don't use, it is just for now, I am not a huge fan of my 4 year old using the word. He points out every time he hears someone else use the word, and for the next couple of days, will try throwing it in anywhere he can in conversation, just to see what I will do. He loves getting a reaction. He always has. Now it isn't just because we don't allow the word "stupid" that we are thinking of home schooling.

A is busy, very busy. He is very intelligent and is easily bored. He is so enthusiastic, the most enthusiastic person I know. I don't want this part of him squashed. He would be 1 of 5 boys in a class of 26. I have worked in classrooms of mostly female students. The boys are treated like freaks. For real. I have seen it so many times. I love my child more then the teacher does, so why would they be more equipped to teach him? How are they more concerned for his welfare then I am? I could list more and more reasons. It just feels like everything is pointing us in this direction. We are praying A LOT about this, because we do feel it is a huge decision. I would much rather be out on an acreage or in a bigger center where more people home schooled, because I am sure we will get a lot of criticism in our small town where all the other children are in school. If you read this, please pray for guidance for us. Wisdom to do what is best for our boys, and for me, confidence to stand for my decision.

I have heard my sister quote Mary Oliver, "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" I hear this in my head often, but slightly different. "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with you child's wild and precious life?"

Jeepers. What would you do?